In the process of writing my book on grief and loss, I interviewed dozens of widows about their own grief and sense of loss. Eventually, I started getting emails from others who experienced different types of loss. Others shared a lament for their child, sister, mother or close friend. Often during these conversations, the question that I am most frequently asked is this: How do you trust in God after your husband died? My answer is always hesitant because there are days when I’m not sure how or why I continue to believe. Sometimes, I stumble and people catch my awkward pause.
For some of you, this is not a formal religious or theological construct that you question. It is more of an issue of spirituality, a form of goodness, a pure intention, whatever it is that tugs at your soul. I know that the grief-stricken feel abandoned by God and cheated by life.
Wrestling with your spiritual beliefs is natural. It is difficult to feel generous and loving when your entire world is gone. Wishful thinking will not bring back your sister, parent, child or spouse. Death tells us as much about ourselves as it does about the person we lost. You will feel raw, fragile and vulnerable. For this reason, if you are looking for heartfelt advice, seek out a non-judgmental Continue reading